We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
