He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
