Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Fuck appropriateness.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
