Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
