6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
