That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize
