If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
pray to the hookup gods
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
