at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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