Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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