my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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