College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
