i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
