I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
