I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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