2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize