Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I supernannyed him into submission
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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