Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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