Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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