Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize