Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
