Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize