There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
