If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
