Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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