Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Randomize
