If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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