I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize