It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
