it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
