soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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