Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
