bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
