She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
