Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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