He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I skipped work to stalk him.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
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