Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Shame - the story of my life.
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