So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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