Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I am naked and annoyed.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
