I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
