What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Randomize
