look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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