..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Randomize