Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize