Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
