Non-Jews are for practice
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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