I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
