Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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