sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
You were trust falling into bushes
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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