dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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