did you get engaged???
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
