ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
