I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize